Cautiously optimistic...

I am happy to report that we are now a binkie free house hold. It really happened by accident more than planning. We lost the last binkie on Monday and it still has not surfaced. While I am happy with the outcome, I am also a little nervous that Lila is going to find a binkie in some bizarre place and then we'll have to start this process all over again.

The saddest moment was nap time on Tuesday. She had gotten used to only having the binkie for nap time and bed times, so I decided to snuggle her in my bed and spend a little more time reading and singing to her than I normally do since it was the first time without the binkie. She looked at me with her big brown eyes and asked, "Binkie?" "Oh honey, remember? We lost the binkie." She thought about that for a moment and then said, "But mo-oom, binkies are for nap times." I gave her a hug and said, "I know honey, but I don't have one to give you. Besides you are a big girl now. Big girls don't need binkies like little babies do." Her lip got mutinous at that point and she said, "I NOT a big girl. I a LITTLE girl. LITTLE girls NEED binkies." It took a little more conversation to prove to her satisfaction that I wasn't just holding out on her and that the binkie was really gone, but she eventually settled down and went to sleep. And she has only asked for it a few times since then and not at all in the last day! Yay!

I am torn between being happy that the baby stage of my life is over, and being sad that the baby stage of my life is over. It's an interesting thing to contemplate as Mother's Day approaches and I am spending a lot of time thinking about the kind of mother I want to be vs. the kind of mother I am. I think I'm shooting for a happy medium somewhere between Super Mom and Earth Mother, with just a dash of June Cleaver thrown in. I think I'd look good in pearls...